Showing posts with label list. Show all posts
Showing posts with label list. Show all posts

Wednesday, July 15, 2009

Ten Movies that Scared the Piss Out of Me When I was Young

Flicks that Scared Me as a Child

Growing up, I had an unhealthy fascination with all things horror (some things don't change). My mother likes to tell the story of how when I was three years old, I embarassed her by wandering around the store telling everyone that we were going to watch the Texas Chainsaw Massacre. Of course, she wouldn't let me watch Texas Chainsaw Massacre, but she did eventually let me watch tamer horror flicks. Little did she know, they would end up affecting me enough so that I'd become a bonafide horror afficionado. To make matters worse, I also had a brother who was seven years older than me, occasionally using his advanced wisdom to pervert me with R-rated horror fare.

Here is a list of ten of those films that, at least in some way, left me a little bit traumatized and made me into the man I am today. And they are in no particular order.

1. The Witches (1990) - Who knew a Jim Henson production could freak the hell out of a six year old kid? Ah, that's right, this was directed by Nicholas Roeg. I remember that my parents took me to the theater to watch this one, and I had to cover my eyes during the transformation scenes. Perhaps what really worried me was that my brother had me convinced that the lady that lived behind us was none other than a witch herself, and this film only confirmed my suspicion that witches could easily live among us, with noone being the wiser. Son of a bitch, that's still true! Watch the TRAILER.

2. Jaws (1975) - Jaws is definitely one of the horror films I watched earliest in my development. I remember that I couldn't have been more than three years old when I first laid eyes on Bruce, the man eating star of the film. What stuck with me the most are the scenes with Sheriff Brody's sons (especially the youngest). To this day, I still fear the deep sea. I don't really know how much of an explanation you'll need for Jaws, as I am pretty sure that it has been scaring people off of beaches since its release. Watch the TRAILER.

3. Stephen King's It (1990) - I was six years old when Stephen King's It first hit the small screen. For some reason my mother, who had read the book even, deemed it appropriate material for a small kid to see. The first scene with little Georgie getting his armed ripped off stuck with me and haunted my dreams for years after. To this day, the image of Tim Curry's Pennywise will flash across my mind from time to time, giving me the willys. Watch a CLIP.

4. A Nightmare on Elm St. 3: Dream Warriors - This is one that I watched with my older brother on a rented VHS. Part three in the ANOES was my first introduction to Freddy Krueger and it would leave an imperssion. Not only was it my first introduction to that burnt up pedophile Krueger, but it also was one of my first introductions to the female body. Remember that water bed scene? I don't even want to begin to think about what that must have done to my impressionable mind, to see a beautiful naked woman turn into an undead child killer, so let's not even discuss that. Watch the TRAILER.

5. Mr. Boogedy (1986)/Bride of Boogedy (1987) - These were two made for TV Disney movies that were aimed at children and families that starred Richard Masur and Mimi Kennedy. They both involved a phantom of sorts that haunts a town called Lucifer Falls (get it!?). Looking back, they feature great casts with the likes of John Astin, Eugene Levy, and Kristy Swanson being among the groups in the two films. Anyway, Mr. Boogedy was my first real boogeyman that I thought was going to eat me if I didn't hide under my blanket at night. Watch the WHOLE FILM ON YOUTUBE.

6. Return to Oz (1985) - Sure, it's not a horror movie, but you couldn't have convinced me of that when I was a kid. To be honest, I don't remember what exactly scared me about this movie. I think it was the weird monkey creatures, or maybe that tin can robot dude, but it could have been the odd looking Fairuza Balk for all I can remember. The point is, there was so much freaky crap in this movie, that I don't know if I can watch it now without feeling tense. Watch the TRAILER.

7. Buried Alive (1990) - This particular Buried Alive is a TV movie from 1990 that stars Tim Matheson and Jennifer Jason Leigh. It was helmed by future Stephen King adapter Frank Darabont. This is one that I have not seen in nineteen years, not since it was first aired on television. From what I remember it was a revenge tale of a husband (Matheson) whose wife (Leigh) tries to kill him, but doesn't quite succeed, and he comes back from OUT OF THE GRAVE to seek vengeance. Sounds like it should've been an episode of Tales From the Crypt (which, by the way, that show didn't exactly help me become a well adjusted child either). Pretty heavy stuff for a six year old to handle!

8. Pet Sematary (1989) - Jesus, where do I start with what scared me in Pet Sematary? Little undead infant Gage Creed running around killing Herman Munster, ghostly teenager whose missing half of his head or...ah, yes, that's the one. Rachel Creed's spinal menangitis riddled sister Zelda. You remember Zelda, right? That freaky bitch that Rachel had to help feed when she was a kid? Man, that freaked me so far out when I was a kid. Today it doesn't have the same impact, but at the time I had to wonder if something like that could happen in real life...could people turn into deformed monsters? Perhaps that was one of the first times in my life that I had to come to terms with the horrors of illness, with nature taking its toll on us and changing our feeble bodies against our will. Or maybe she was just one freaky bitch. Watch the TRAILER.

9. Alice Sweet Alice (1976) - I remember actually watching this one with my sister, so it wasn't all my brother's fault. We had this one on video tape. For those that haven't seen it, the film is about the murder of a young girl (a pre-Blue Lagoon Brooke Shields) that is killed during her first communion and what happens, as a result, to her reclusive sister and main suspect, Alice. It's actually a pretty decent little horror/thriller that you should check out, but it did definitely freak me out as a kid. There's so much Catholic iconography in the film, I can only imagine how screwed up it would have made me had I been Catholic! Watch a FAN MADE TRAILER

10. Drop Dead Fred (1991) - Sure. Drop Dead Fred is comedy. Or at least that's what they want you to think. When I saw this one video I must have been around seven years old, and, luckily, I never had an imaginary friend. But that didn't change the fact that Fred scared the beegezus out of me. I mean, even with the beautiful Phoebe Cates there to distract me, I was still freaked out. Especially by the damn dream sequence. I think it was just the concept that Fred, a figment of Lizzie's imagination, just would not leave her alone. It worried me. Hmmmm...I wonder if my family has a history of mental illness? Damn, I am finding out a lot about myself. Watch the TRAILER.

And there you have it, folks, the ten movies that screwed me up the most. Oh, sure, there were others. I remember watching the sequels to both Halloween and The Evil Dead on VHS at a young age. They didn't help matters, but I don't think that they had quite as much of an impact as the ten flicks listed above. What about you? Why are you so messed up?

Wednesday, July 8, 2009

Top Ten Horror Movies of the 1950s

Top Ten Horror Flicks of the Fifties

Going back to the fifties, it becomes harder to find a distinct line between horror and sci-fi. In this era, the byproducts of science had become the most horrific things imaginable (check out Radiation Cinema for more on that). The nuclear era was in full swing, and the public knew little about what kind of effects this could really have on them. So, we get pictures with shrinking people and giant ants. This being the case, I'm really not going to make any attempt to exclude films that may be more sci-fi/horror than they are horror/sci-fi. It's really easier this way.

And, full disclosure (just so I don't get lynched), I've never seen Diabolique or Eyes Without a Face. But I will.

10. House of Wax (1953) - What's that? A 3D remake of Michael Curtiz's Mystey of the Wax Museum starring Vincent Price? Mark me down. If you liked the earlier Curtiz effort, then you'll enjoy this somewhat campier, but more energetic and creative remake. It's the story of a horribly disfigured man who takes out his agression on his victim, subsoquently dipping their dead bodies into wax and putting them on display at his wax mueseum. From that description alone, you have to give the film cool points. Add the fact that the evil caretaker of this museum is none other than the late, great Vincent Price and I think we've got a winner on our hands.

9. Abbott and Costello Meet Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde (1953) - Setting a prescedent for what would in later years become an absolute staple in the horror world, the horror-comedy, the Abbot and Costello "Meet" films were a necessary smirk on the face of horror film. It seems that horror goes through cycles. When the Universal Monster pictures were first released, they were shockingly scary pictures that frightened every movie goer who braved them. But by the late forties and early fifties, those same Universal Monsters had been pretty much played out as Universal cashed in on as many spinoffs and sequels as they could. By that point, the only thing left to do with them was to play them for laughs. The same is true for most horror franchises that carry on a little passed their prime. Think about Freddy's Dead and Jason X or Leprechaun in tha Hood. Yeah, it's still happening. Going back to the film in question, the "Meet Jekyll and Hyde" is the best of the pictures that they made. Go back and watch it, it's a riot.

8. The Tingler (1959) - It's hard not to admire William Castle. The man was the PT Barnum of the film world, giving his sometimes lackluster films extra cache by incorporating great gimmicks into the screenings. For The Tingler, Castle had theater attendants wire their seats with joy buzzer type devices that would administaor a small shock during certain pivotal scenes. Fascinating! On top of all that, the movie itself ain't half bad either! Vincent Price, at his campiest, plays Dr. Chapin, a doctor who unwittingly unleashes a slug-like creature that is formed from...fear. That's right, it's hokey, but undoubtedly one of the most fun creature features you're likely to see.

7. Horror of Dracula (1958) - You knew there had to be at least some Hammer Horror make its way onto the list, and what better picture than 1958's Horror of Dracula? Known simply as Dracula in its native Britain, the picture stars, you guessed it, Peter Cushing as Van Helsing, and Christopher Lee as Dracula himself. We're lucky that Hammer was still around to remind us that gothic horror could still be really excellent, even while Hollywood was busy tackling new foes. Perhaps the best cinematic telling of the Dracula story, Horror of Dracula gives us just the right amount of horror, eroticism, action, and humor.


6. The Thing From Another World (1951) - Later on, this picture would be completely restructured as (and bested by) John Carpenter's The Thing. But even though the "remake" is superior, doesn't mean that the original isn't a wonderful little scientists in the arctic unwittingly thaw out a blood thirsty alien that has been frozen in the ice. From there, you can imagine what kind of bedlam breaks loose. If you've only seen Carpenter's version, you'll be surprised to find out that the Thing in this picture is a humanoid (James Arness, no less!) and that the strong sense of paranoia is all but nonexistent. Even still, the film is a tight little exercise in tension and fear of the unknown. I would really recommend that you get your hands on a copy of this Howard Hawks produced (and, perhaps partially directed) gem.

5. The Blob (1958) - Starring a young Steve McQueen, The Blob is an oft under appreciated little gem about a gelatinous, all devouring creature from outer space run amok in small town America! The film plays out like a lot of films from the fifties, there's a group of teenagers that become privy to the alien's existence, but nobody believes them until things start to get pretty hairy. Actually, I guess that's still the trope for a lot of modern horror flicks as well. If ain't brok I guess...anyway, even though the story sounds pretty stock, it's exceptionally well made (especially for a non-major studio film in the fifties!) and actually still holds up well today.

4. Them! (1954) - Giant insect movies were a staple of the fifties sci-fi/horror genre, but none were better than 1954's Them!. The story is simple, a group of investigators and scientsits come upon a group of giant, radiated, killer ants! From there, the army gets involved and eventually everything works itself out (though, not without a few casualties). Like I said, a simple story but one told deftly and shot skillfully enough to clearly set it apart from a lot of the other, often rushed and hackneyed, giant insect flicks of the same era. Check it out if you're a fan.

3. House on Haunted Hill (1959) - An absolute horror classic, House on Haunted Hill sets up a trope that would be used in horror films for a long time. The idea of gathering a group of people together and having them stay a night in a haunted house has been used over and over again throughout the years. Sometimes its pride that's at stake, in the case of House on Haunted Hill, it's a cash prize that lures the victims into the house. Vincent Price, in the role he was born to play, delivers the goods as the creepy-as-hell Frederick Loren, host of this macabre party. This is probably William Castle's most respectable picture, but that didn't deter him from bringing in at least one of his patented gimmicks. During a particularly pivotal scene in the film, there happens to be a flying skeleton. Well, if you happened to be in the theatrical audience for the film upon opening, you might just have been lucky enough to witness a lovely plastic skeleton flying from the rafters of your cinema as well!

2. The Incredible Shrinking Man (1957) - Based on an amazing story by Richard Matheson (which I highly recommend you read), The Incredible Shrinking Man is the story of Scott Carey, a man who becomes radiated by a cloud of pesticide and, you guessed it, begins to shrink. While the effects were quite stunning for the time, and there's a lot of emphasis on the science fiction elements of the story, the real meat of the things lies within Carey's ability and inability to cope with his physical defencies (in his case, shrinking). The tension between he and his wife becomes obvious the smaller he gets, and it becomes increasingly difficult for him to function. Of course, there are spectacular action sequences as well, including an epic fight with a spider.

1. Invasion of the Body Snatchers (1956) - Usually read as an allegory about Mcarthyism (the writer was black-listed), Invasion of the Body Snatchers is a timeless tale about people not being exactly what we think they are...of course, in this case, "not what we think they are" means replacement "pod" people from outer space. No biggie. Anyway, the movie is a true classic piece of fifties science fiction terror and tension that ends in one of the most iconinc closings in cinema history. Having been remade many times (including a rarely seen effort from Abel Ferrara), the original is still the best and a great starting point for anybody interested in the world of terrificly terryfing vintage sci-fi/horror pictures.

Wednesday, July 1, 2009

Top Ten Horror Movies of the 1960s

As we go back further in time, the movies get less gory, there are fewer sub genres, and we lose that sta

10. Witchfinder General (1968) - Ever wanted to see Vincent Price in his most evil role? Look no further than Witchfinder General (sometimes known as Conqueror Worm). This Michael Reeves directed period piece is the story of Matthew Hopkins (Price), notorious witchhunter and rapist, as he makes his way across Europe driving confessions out of innocents and then killing them for their troubles. I told you that it was Price's most devious role. This little British piece most definitely needs to be seen more, luckily the DVD is readily available (namely in the Vincent Price Collection), so pick it up!

9. What Ever Happened to Baby Jane? (1962) - Robert Aldrich directs and Bette Davis and Joan Crawford star in this tale of former child star Jane Hudson (and aged Bette Davis) and her sister Blanche (Crawford). Davis' Baby Jane is absolutely creepy-as-hell and one of the recurring figures from my nightmares as a child. Watch the two sisters relationship as it collapses further into truly bizarre oblivion. A great film, and Aldrich's later Hush...Hush Sweet Charlotte makes a wonderful companion piece to it!


8. The Birds (1963) - You knew that Alfred Hitchcock would be on here in some shape or fashion, and he debuts on the list with one of my favorite genres: animals run amok. In Hitch's case, its harmless little birdies that go nuts on humanity. Tippi Hedren stars, along with a whole bunch of birds, in this one. While it may be considrered pretty tame by today's standards, I gurantee that for days after you watch this flick, you'll feel ill at ease when you find yourself around a large group of bids.


7. The Last Man on Earth (1964) - This adaptation of Richard Matheson's beloved novel I am Legend is actually really good. With noneother than Vincent Price in the lead Dr. Robert Morgan (Neville from the book), The Last Man on Earth does take its fair share of liberties with the story, but gets the themes pretty much right, which is something that you really have to do when adapting this particular novel. Though possibly miscast here, Vincent Price does a very good job trying to capture the intricacies of the self-destructive last man on the planet.

6. Pit and the Pendulum (1961) - The teaming of Roger Corman, Barbara Steele, and Vincent Price to tackle poe is like a gothic fanboy's wet dream. I'll spare you the details on the story, but I do have to talk a little bit about the glorious set pieces in the film that really pop. The gothic soundstages are particularly extravagent, especially for an AIP picture. The influence that this film had on later Italian directors like Bava and Argento is pretty evident upon first viewing, and makes the film that much more interesting when watched in context.

5. Carnival of Souls (1962) - One of the eeriest pictures you may have never seen Carnival of Souls is a near masterpiece directed by a ma, Herk Harvey, who is relatively unknown outside of this film. After a tragic accident, our heroine, Mary, travels to a town to become an organist in a church. Seeing strange apparations at an abandoned carnival, Mary begins to realize that everything is not as it seems in this new town. The movie is filled with great imagery that will really stick with you. Carnival of Souls is available everywhere on DVD and on the net because it is public domain, but I would definitely recommend the Criterion Collection DVD release.


4. The Fearless Vampire Killers (1967) - Roman Polanski directs and stars in this hilarious take on the vampire genre. This farce, sometimes known as Dance of the Vampires, is the story of Professor Abronsius and his assistant as they stumble ass backwards into the hands of Count Krolock and his horde of the undead! I highly recommend that you try this flick out, especially if you enjoy films like Young Frankenstein or any of the Abbot and Costello meet the Universal monster pictures. Great stuff.


3. Rosemary's Baby (1968) - Polanski makes the list for a second time, this one, however, is played completely straight. One of his greatest achievements, Rosemary's Baby managed to be both a fantastic film and a commercial success (never an easy feat) that really pushed the envelope of what was taboo in American cinema. I'm sure it was at least a little shocking to see a film about a woman being impregnated by the Prince of Darkness back in 1968. No matter what the socio-political climate may have been in the 'Nam/Manson/Hippie era, American film had (and still is to a lesser degree) been historically conservative. That must've been a kick in the head for a lot of right-wingers, but there is little question that it's a wonderful picture.

2. Psycho (1960) - Hitchcock's master piece of susepnse may drag a little long for some people, but if you have the patience to get through the somewhat tedious set-up, Psycho is an amazing character study that still has the ability to chill today. Anthony Perkins' Norman Bates is a truly strange character, but especially for 1960. A cross-dressing, corpse loving mama's boy, Bates is somewhat based on notorious necrophile and killer Ed Gein. Obviously I have to mention the notorious shower scene, which all the *oomph* has been taken out of for first time viewers because of the countless parodies. Yes, watching it today, the shower scene still holds up very well and is still one of the all-time greatest deaths.

1. Night of the Living Dead (1968) - Of course George A. Romero's seminal picture that essentially created the rules for the modern zombie tops out the list. There are many layers to the film, people "read" it as a social commentary all the time, the focal point being a black protagonist facing an onslaught of exclusively white foes that never stop barraging him. Obviously there is more to it than that, but that is one way that people "read" the film. Even just on the surface, however, the movie is as fantastic a piece of film-making as you are ever likely to see. The fun, and scary, Alamo-type story is one of the all time greats that allows the viewer to put himself in the same scenario without a whole lot of imagination.

Friday, June 19, 2009

Top Ten Horror Movies of the 1980s

Top Ten Horror Movies of the 1980's (That Aren't Part of a Series)

Ah, yes, I know you want Friday the 13th and Evil Dead II to be on any list of the best of the eighties, but in order to make it a more interesting list, I've done away with convention, and am strictly using films that were never part of a series. That includes even just having a single sequel. So, bye-bye Nightmare on Elm St., Night of the Demons, Re-Animator, Slumber Party Massacre, Hellraiser, and all of you would-be top tenners. This is actually harder to do, because in the eighties, they wanted to enfranchise pretty much everything. On with the list:


10. Dead Heat (1988) - In the eighties, buddy cop movies were all the rage. And, dammit, I enjoy them. So what better possible idea could there be than to add zombies into the mix? Think Lethal Weapons meets Dawn of the Dead as directed by Harold Ramis. While it may not actually be as good as either on of the films mentioned, Dead Heat manages to be an extremely entertaining, campy-as-hell flick that makes for one great saturday night viewing experience. And, really, when a film features both Darren McGavin and and aged Vincent Price, you can count me in anytime.

9. The Burning (1981)
0 - One of the best slashers to never be franchised (and, subsequentily completely beaten to death), The Burning is very similar to Friday the 13th in that both take place at secluded summer camps and both feature creative kills. Interestingly enough, this and Friday the 13th both were filmed in the same year, and, somehow the producers of The Burning were able to seduce Tom Savini away from doing the effects in Sean Cunningham's film in order to do this one. What's different about the two is that, of course, in Friday the 13th the killer is Jason's mother, where as the killer in The Burning (Cropsy) is actually kind of a prototype for Jason.


8. Night of the Creeps (1986) - Fred Dekker is the man responsible for three wonderful genre expereinces from the eighties: Monster Squad, House, and Night of the Creeps. The latter makes out list at number seven. Coming soon to DVD (with both endings!), Night of the Creeps is the story of two college freshmen trying their best to make a good impression on some sorority chicks, when a prank goes horribly wrong, releasing a horde of parasitic "creeps" on their unsuspecting town. The film very deftly mixes that eighties college sex-comedy humor, with campy sci-fi/horror action to deliver a really excellent picture, that is enhanced even more by Tom Atkins excellently hammy turn as a local police detective out for revenge.

7. From Beyond (1986) - Along with his Re-Animator (which can't make the list due to its specifications), Stuart Gordon's From Beyond is an excellent example of what made eighties horror so great. A loose adaptation of an HP Lovecraft work, From Beyond relies on excellent, and gooey, practical effects to carry the picture along. The always wonderful Jeffery Combs and Barbara Crampton kind of switch roles from Re-Animator, and both do really great work here, in a story about scientists attempting to stimulate the pineal gland and gain access to a parallel universe.

6. City of the Living Dead (1980) - Lucio Fulci's first entry on the list comes in the form of his zombie opus City of the Living Dead (sometimes known as The Gates of Hell). Renowned for it's generally disgusting gore (gut vomit, anyone?), the film is enveloped with a sense of dread that can only be created by Fulci or Lovecraft. As is the case with most Fulci flicks, the atmosphere, set pieces, and gags take center stage above pesky things like plot, but anyone who can appreciate what the man brings to the table will love it. The first part of Fulci's loosely knit, themeatic "Gates of Hell" or "Dead" trilogy, this film should be a requisite DVD in any genre fan's collection.


5. Near Dark (1987) - Forget Twilight, this is the real get your frills deal when it comes to vampire love stories. Near Dark is the tale of a young man from Oklahoma that happens to find himself in a bit of prickly situation. So, the ending is a little implausible, big deal. Don't let the "romance" tag that I used, or the poster, fool you, there are significant scenes of brutality in this film. Tune in for fantastic performances by Bill Paxton and genre staple Lance Henriksen, as they maim and slice there way through the countryside.

4. The Beyond (1981) - Fulci lifts his hand out of the grave one more time and comes in fourth on the list, this time with his epic film The Beyond (aka The Seven Doors of Death). The Beyond is a very Lovecraftian story, that, similarly to City of the Living Dead, places most of the emphasis on anything but the story. If you must know, the plot is something like this: "a young lady inherits a very old hotel in Louisiana. Eventually, after some incidents, she comes to the knowledge that the hotel was actually built over one of seven entrances to Hell." Kind of trite, but workable. Regardless, the film manages to be an extremely creepy and macabre mix of gothic horrors and gory goodies.

3. The Shining (1980) - Stanley Kubrick's only true foray into horror as a genre is still one of the greatest films ever made. I'd be remiss if the first thing I mentioned wasn't Jack Nicholson's perforamnce as Jack Torrance in the film. Nicholson delivers the performance of his life in this one, as he shows us the transformation from recovering alcoholic father into all out, ghost-seeing maniac. Kubrick's eye for composition is really showcased in this one as well, as the enormous hotel provides him with a great canvas on which to work. If you haven't seen The Shining, you are doing yourself a grave disservice.

2. Videodrome (1983) - Sometimes difficult for me to actually categorize as horror, there's no doubt that David Cronenberg's Videodrome is a phenomenally, horrific tale of intrigue and exploitation. The film stars James Woods as Max Renn, a sleazy cable operator that gets caught up in a very mysterious and shady conspiracy. The film is what I would call a surrealist mind-fuck that really begs to be watched on more than once to fully try to come to terms with its intricacies. Videodrome is definitely one of the best sci-fi/horror films out there, and has a lot of underlying facets, which is typical of David Cronenberg's work.

1. The Thing (1982) - To me, there aren't very many films that are as taut and suspensful as John Carpenter's masterpiece The Thing. A loose remake of The Thing from Another World, The Thing is an exercise in crafting both eerily claustrophobic atmosphere and stunning pratical effects. Not for the paranoid, The Thing is the story of a small group of people in the arctic that are having to deal with a very strange epidemic that has infected their camp...that being, an alien being. Who's good? Who's bad? And there's lots of ugly to be seen in this fantastic picture.

Tuesday, June 9, 2009

Top Ten Horror Films of the 2000s

A Decade of the Dead

This list is (hopefully) likely to change, but here are my revised picks for the best horror pictures of this decade. I say revised picks, because I've already made one such list, less than a year ago as a matter fact, but it has changed significantly. Check out my old list here and see the difference!


10. Slither (2006) - From the mind of former Tromaville resident James Gunn comes a wickedly funny B-movie in the tradition of Night of the Creeps. Slither stars Henry himself, Michael Rooker, as Grant Grant, the guy that eventually becomes the host for some strange alien creature that really like to eat. If you're a fan of campy, fun-filled horror romps through icky muck and goo, if you liked Slime City or Street Trash, you'll enjoy this little homage to all things gross-out. Check it out, some great laughs, and a pretty enjoyable little story!

9. Inside (2007) - One of the most brutal films in recent memory, Inside is the story of a young pregnant woman that is mercilessly accosted by a madwoman. Yes, you read that right. This violent-ass flick features a female antagonist (and protagonist, too!). See it for the visceral experience, see it for the gore, whatever reason you've got, just see it. Especially before the requisite American remake (it's bound to happen) comes out, so you can act smarmy to all of your friends about it (I do!). (SPOILERS AHEAD) Did anyone else notice it takes a turn for the weird at the end when one of the dead cops gets up at the end and begins to assault the main character? Wtf?

8. Grindhouse (Deathproof/Planet Terror) (2007) - Yeah, we are putting both films together. Tarantino and Rodriguez came together with a very solid one-two punch with Grindhouse. Of course, the entire thing is a throwback, not just the films themselves, but the way that's it is crafted together, including the little trailers in between the pictures, the missing second reels, and all of that. Tarantino and Rodriguez put together a theater-going experience that you just can't get anymore, for themselves, but also for the fans of genre pictures like these. Now, if that's not worth getting a nod on this list, I don't know what is. And, luckily, this homage is crafted by two expert film-makers, with a penchant for sensational film-making. The movies themseleves were actually quite good. Certainly this was a daunting project for Rodriguez and Tarrantino, and a lot of work, but it pays off.

7. Haute Tension (High Tension) (2003) - The French are really starting to make a name for themselves in the horror community with stuff like Inside, but it seems like it can all be traced back to Alexander Aja and his crimson-soaked (almost) masterpiece Haute Tension. I'll be the first to admit it, I don't like the ending either. I found it pretty trite, and a bit of a cop-out. Maybe that's because I had just seen so many flicks with similar endings around the same time period, but maybe it was just overdone. Regardless of its flaws, High Tension lives up to its title, keeping you on the edge of your seat. And my goodness, does Aja ever keep the red stuff coming. And The Warfreak likey.

6. Shaun of the Dead (2004) - Hilarious. Absolutely hilarious. Another film that is conceptually an homage (in case you are extremely uninformed, the name is a riff on Dawn of the Dead), and is gut-bustingly funny in execution. Shaun of the Dead keeps the gore at a hard R, but still manages to be bitingly funny, and even sometimes romantic! Writer/Director Edgar Wright is definitely going to continue to be a comedic force to be reckoned with over his career, and I look forward to more forays into the horror genre from him.

5. [REC] (2007) - This little Spanish film (remade in America as Quarantine) clocks in at just over and hour, but the experience will last much longer than that. [rec] is yet another found footage film (Cloverfield, Blair Witch, Home Movie, etc.), but is more effectively scary than the rest. I mean it when I say that, this film is scary. Unfortunately, the trailers for the American remake probably ruined most of the scares (from what I understand it's basically shot-for-shot), but I still suggest you watch it.


4. American Psycho (2000) - You say what you will, but American Psycho is a straight up exploitation film in the mold of all my favorites. It's the story of Patrick Batemen, a well-manacured psychotic killer in the 1980s. It's like Wall Street meets Henry: Portrait of a Serial Killer. Forget the ambiguity of the ending, and focus on the whacked out, twistedness of the film. It's definitely one of the most quotable movies on the list ("I have to return some video tapes"), and that's always a plus. Look, I'm not suggesting Patrcik Bateman is a role model, but you could do worse.

3. Martyrs (2008) - The final French film to make our list, Martyrs in an excercise sadism. What makes the movie so chilling is not the explicit, horrific violence shown on the screen (which there is plenty of), but the bleak worldview that film exudes. The whole thing will leave you cold and numb and asking for your mommy. Maybe that's a bit much, but if you don't feel something after you watch this one you may already be dead. Not for the weak of stomach, Martyrs delivers on every level, it's both cerebral and visceral, disgusting and beautiful.

2. Bubba Ho-Tep (2002) - Don Coscarelli makes weird movies (almost exclusively Phantasms and Beastmasters), and Bubba Ho-Tep is no exception. This hilarious B-movie pits Bruce "Don't Call Me Ash" Campbell's old-ass Elvis Presley and the late Ossie Davis' JFK (yep) against an ancient mummy in a showdown at a retirement home. Yeah, that's the plot. As ridiculous as that sounds, the laughs keep rolling, especially thanks to Campbell and Davis' great turns as the deceased historical figures. Great campy fun.

1. Let the Right One In (2008) - Absolutely the single best vampire movie I've ever seen, LTROI is a wonderful little Swedish masterpiece, full of all the things horror movies never contain. The movie is rather sweet, has endearing characters, features young romance, and all of the things you never knew you wanted in a horror movie. Luckily, the craftsmanship behind this cold beauty carries everything, it's an absolutely breathtaking film, the cinematography is spectacular, and the direction is sometimes inspired, and always good.

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